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Saturday, 18 May 2019

REVIEW: Our Last Goodbye by Shirley Dickson (ARC)


Our Last Goodbye by Shirley Dickson
Genre: Historical fiction
Read: 17th May 2019
Purchase: Amazon
(release date: 29th May 2019)

★★★★★ 5 stars

I read Shirley Dickson's debut novel "The Orphan Sisters" earlier this year and I absolutely loved it! So I was thrilled when I began OUR LAST GOODBYE to discover it picked up with familiar characters such as May, Etty, Derek and the Newmans as well as the introduction of some new faces. But this time, rather than Etty's story, we follow May and her journey. 

From the first pages, OUR LAST GOODBYE is an emotional, heart-wrenching story of love and loss amidst the horror of war during WW2, set in the northeast of England in 1943 and 1944.

At 24, May Robinson didn't have much to show for her life except her son Derek, being brought up as her younger brother by her Mam. She worked in a factory making munitions and went home to frosty reception from her father who had practically disowned her after "shaming the family" with her indiscretions. The only light she had was her loving Mam and Derek, who was now billeted to a farm in the country, out of harm's way from the attack of air raids, and her friendship with Etty. Without them, May doesn't know what she would do.

One foggy night, May and her Mam are walking home in the blackout after a night out at the pictures. Unable to find her torch in her bag, her Mam sees a trolley bus approaching and in an attempt to hail it in the fog, falls into its path...and is tragically killed. May is devastated. Worse still, she must break the news to Derek who adored their Mam.

One night after work, May opens the door to the place she has called home since she was a bairn, where she had given birth to Derek, to find a strange woman ordering her to find somewhere else to live as they have tenants moving in. THEY, being her father and his new woman. Suddenly, May finds herself homeless. Where now can she go? Etty.

Etty and May go way back when Etty and her sister Dorothy came to Shields from the orphanage in which they grew up. Dorothy had befriended May and soon after Etty joined her sister and became friends with May also, despite a little jealousy between the two as Etty was not used to sharing her sister with anyone. But when Dorothy was tragically killed in an air raid just 6 months ago, Etty and May were there for each other throughout their grief. Now Etty was there for May in her's.

Finding it had to difficult to deal with her mother's death, May made a decision. To train as a nurse with the thought that if only she'd known what to do when Mam had her accident she might have saved her. So at Etty's suggestion, May applied to become a probationary nurse at Edgemoor General Hospital and much to her surprise she passes the entry exam and begins her training.

Now living in the nurse's quarters, the arrangement suits May after being kicked out of her only home and falling out with Etty after discovering the truth about Etty's daughter's parentage. She swore she would never forgive Etty and buried herself in her training and becoming a nurse without another thought. But soon she found herself missing Etty. Still after her transgression she couldn't forgive her...not yet.

Whilst in training, May meets Maureen another probationary nurse. She reminds May of Etty with her gentle ways and her wise words. She found in Maureen a confidant that she missed in Etty.  When May met young Alec on the road one evening he began to pursue May and was persistent in his intentions, despite May's misgivings about getting involved with anyone. She was still mourning Billy to whom she was engaged (a term Billy used "loosely") and had become another casualty of the war. But Alec was persistent. May, being the gentle soul that she is and not wanting to hurt anyone's feelings, always gave in and went out with him. 

At Christmas Alec took her to his nan's, who appeared on edge and always fussing and making sure everything was perfect. When Alec spoke abruptly to his nan, May thought it strange that the woman was so compliant and apologetic toward him. Then Alec saw her talking to a young naval officer at a dance and becoming angered he accused her of flirting with him. He later apologised and said it was because he cared for her so much that he got so jealous. May confided in Maureen who said that caring for someone means you love and respect them and you don't hurt them. She urged her to be careful.

Then Alec began surprising her on her days off by turning up at the nurse's quarters. May was uncomfortable with this and began to feel a little suffocated. When Alec displayed his jealousy in the form of violence when he saw her talking to the son of a patient at the hospital, he grabbed her and began accusing her of having all these men on the go and stringing him along. She knew then she must escape him, and ran for the approaching trolley bus yelling "I don't ever want to see you again!" Then just as May thought she was safe, he followed her back to her quarters and told her she was his now and he decided how things were to be. But as he drew his arm back to throw May a punch to the face, he was grabbed from behind and told in no uncertain terms not to return. May was ever grateful, and turned to her rescuer - Richard Bentley, a porter at the hospital and a known "conchie", a conscientious objector.

It was common knowledge around the hospital that Richard was a "conchie" and that put him in a bad light as far as most people were concerned. May, on the one hand, couldn't understand how he could just stand by while others put their lives on the line for their country, while on the other, admired him for standing up for his beliefs and convictions. Unfortunately, it didn't always come out of her mouth that way and she usually ended up insulting him. Richard, however, was used to such talk. But May found herself drawn to Richard, often thinking about him but telling herself there would be no future for them. Maureen advised her to be careful because feelings about "conchies" was rife.

Then Maureen decided to follow her heart and do what she set out to do before training as a nurse. After speaking to the chaplain at the hospital she entered the convent to become a nun. But she was put her nurse's training to good use and move to London to work in convent hospital there. May felt Maureen's absence bitterly when she left, particularly as she still missed Etty. Although May knew she had forgiven Etty she wasn't ready to speak to her yet.

May and Richard become friends, but to have a relationship would be difficult due to Richard being a "conchie". Can they ever have a chance at a life together? As May holds the secret of her past close, would Richard still love her if he knew the truth? But then the unexpected happens and May's life is thrown into turmoil. How could she deal with everything? Find a home for her and Derek and give up her nursing career? Can May and Etty's friendship survive? Will Richard and May ever have the chance at a future together?

Life in England is not easy in the midst of war with the constant threat of invasion, food shortages and rationing, air raids and bombing almost nightly. It would a terrifying time in which to live.

A heart-wrenching novel OUR LAST GOODBYE will have you reaching for the tissues throughout. With a twist to the story near its end, your heart will just ache for May and all she has endured in her short life. A wonderful saga about love and friendship, May's story will just tug at your heartstrings. From the time I picked up the book, I didn't want to leave as I was so wrapped up and invested in the the people and the era I had been transported to.

My only complaint was how it ended. I would have liked to have seen it go a little further than it did and see May get a little more of her happy ending. Don't get me wrong, May DOES have a happy ending...but I just would have liked it to go a little further than it did. Having said that, I hope a third installment will pick up from here so we can see May and Etty in the next stages of their lives.

I would like to thank #ShirleyDickson, #NetGalley and #Bookouture for an ARC of #OurLastGoodbye in exchange for an honest review.

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